How To Get That Book Body // Guest Post with Zoe

» 26 June, 2016 » Guest Post, Vent central » 8 comments

Question: How much does a polar bear weigh?

Enough to break the ice. Hi, my name is Zoe and I’m a guest blogger here on Lilybloombooks! Other than a guest blogger, I’m also just a teenager who is figuring out life through trial and error (I like to think I’m doing a pretty good job), all while I document it on my own blog, Zoe le Zebre. Yet, even though I may be a “young bull,” like many other hoomans, I have been addicted to reading since I pretty much came out the womb. Thus, I’d like to share this love of big books with you all here, today.

Enough about me, though. Right now is not the time to talk about me. Right now is the time to talk about you, and how you can be the best version of you, even though we all already know you’re pretty superfragilicious.

Now, we all know what time of the year it is. It’s that time of the year, where you can no longer hide in your black yoga pants. All you have is your black shorts and I don’t think you’re trying to make your bum look smaller. It’s that time of the year, where you try to get fit, but the heat ends up killing you instead. It’s that time of the year, where you go to the beach and you see all the people who actually took their diets seriously. It’s that time of the year, where everyone goes crazy, trying to look like they were the ones who took their diet seriously (but I totally saw Abby go to town on those donuts, last night). Yeah, you know what time it is. It’s summer time, also known as: bikini season.

Well now comes a new time, the time where I provide you with two options: You can either get your body in shape during the next three months because there’s nothing wrong with being a healthy peanut. I mean, reducing risk for terminal diseases and painful injuries always sounds nice. Or, my personal favorite, you can get your mind in shape to prepare for the waves of read-a-thons, potential trips to the local reading slump dump, or just becoming a new citizen of the book-o-sphere.

What’s that? Do you want to know how to get that bikini body? Well too bad, we’re gonna learn what it takes to get that nice, nerdy book body. If you want a bikini body, just throw a bikini on it.

1. Embrace Your Inner Hermit

Unless you can read a book in the amount of time it takes Usain Bolt to run a foot, then you know reading takes time, especially when the goal is to savor and treasure the story you’re reading. Unfortunately, life doesn’t always agree and tends to steal your precious book time away from you. That’s why I’m here to let you know it’s okay to be that person who locks them-self in a room that’s only 4 sq ft. and is never to be seen again. Don’t be afraid to say “no,” and always try to save a little time (even if it’s five minutes) just for your book babes. If you want those sexy brain wrinkles, you gotta work for it no matter what the haters say.

2. Get Dressed for the Occasion

This one is pretty simple. Think of it like working out. You wouldn’t want to run 3 miles in tight skinny jeans, would you? Probably not, unless you like torturing yourself, but majority of us don’t, so no. And the same goes for reading. If you’re sitting there trying to read in an itchy, ugly Christmas sweater (don’t know why you’d wear a sweater in June, but you do you, boo), all you’re going to be able to think about is how badly you want to scratch your arm pits. Personally, I find that lazing around in my beloved Pikachu onesie gets me inspired and ready to read as many books as my eyes can handle. Therefore, I encourage you to find your one, true Pikachu onesie.

3. Get a New Best Friend (A.K.A Caffeine)

This is mainly meant for those attempting a read-a-thon, but I suppose it could help others as well. You know, if you’re really gun-ho about getting into reading for the first time, second time, or trillionth time (we’re all at different points in our lives). But for whatever reason you want to put your sleeping to the end, caffeine will be your best friend (that was unintentional, but I’m still proud of myself) and always have it on standby. However, caffeine doesn’t just mean coffee. If you’re like me and abhor the drink, then don’t worry, there are tons of other foods/liquids to help defeat the evils of nap time. For example, different teas, Bai (one of my favorites), and there’s even this snack called caffeinated chocolate. To be honest, it doesn’t matter what you eat as long as you’re energized and ready to push through yet another novel.

4. Explore the Book-o-Sphere

Obviously, if you’re reading this blog, then you’re somewhat aware of the book-o-sphere. Tons and tons of people blog or YouTube about books, which is awesome since it not only inspires other hoomans to read, but gives them an idea of what books they would actually like to read. Plus, seeing all the 1,235 books a blogger/booktuber can read in a month makes me feel like I’ve done nothing with my life, which pushes me to at least attempt to read those 1,235 books. After all, seeing other people’s success can push you to succeed as well. So if you’re anything like moi, this should be a great tip for you (hopefully).

5. Jam Out

Music can make people inspired to do anything, so find the songs that get you in the reading mood the most and JAM. OUT.

I sincerely hope these five tips will be of use to you all because they really do help me, and I hope they do the same for you.

On your bookmark!

Get set, Read!

The best of wishes, Z


Zoe is a teenage blogger from the USA, who has an unhealthy obsession with anything beauty-related, and is in a committed relationship with all of her beloved 50+ book boyfriends.

Find Zoe on Instagram | Twitter | Blog

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Tonyalee is an avid reader, coffee junkie, junk food addicted workaholic and blogger. Be sure to follow on Twitter for random shenanigans.
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8 responses to “How To Get That Book Body // Guest Post with Zoe

    • Zoe

      Thanks so much, Lexxie! And it really is true! I think people should try to exercise their mind and expand their horizons, instead of trying to look like an unrealistic and airbrushed model on the cover of a magazine.

  1. Got My Book

    Great post. Now I’m nervous; I’m one of the guest bloggers for next week and I don’t really do funny, this is a lot to live up to.

    I am actually trying to lose some weight right now, but it is more because i can’t afford to buy all new clothes than because I care what the scale says.

    Thankfully I can take my audiobooks on my walks with me.
    Got My Book recently posted…text: I Gave Away an Audiobook | Sunday Summary #8My Profile

    • Zoe

      Thank you so much, but don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll do great! What’s important is that you be yourself. And good luck on your weight loss journey! As long as you’re doing it for yourself and no one else.
      Zoe recently posted…Words to Remember {4}My Profile

  2. Valerie

    Er, can I steal your pikachu onesie? Yes. Ok thanks.

    This was an amazing hilarious post! I really need more caffeine in my life, even though I drink it everyday. Though I HAVE been staying up until 2am for the past couple of days (But then I end up sleeping in into 11, whoops).
    Valerie recently posted…An Innocent Life #12: And It’s July! Wow!My Profile

    • Zoe Wallace

      First I would like to say no, you may not have my pikachu onesie, but I know Amazon sells them for a pretty cheap price, so yeah. And thank you so much! That means so much to me, sometimes I question if I’m actually funny or I’m just a weirdo who thinks I’m funny. I also totally understand your struggle. My sleeping schedule is suffering right now.

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